It's quite late to talk about this now, but
I announced my graduation during the performance on 9th.
Upon joining NMB48, I was able to perform at AKB48's Tokyo Autumn Festival as one of the debuting 26 NMB48 members. But I was not picked for the first NMB48 theater performance on 1/1 and cried with everyone in front of the screen.
On 1/23 I had my first theater performance along with Riho-chan and it went well.
I remember being very stiff because I was so nervous.
Then Team N was announced and I was not chosen.
Everyone cried a lot.
This is when the different amount of work between kenkyuusei and team members became apparent, and people became tense, agitated.
But staff members said it's always possible to become a team member, so please work hard - and everyone did.
This is around the time when kenkyuuseis got their own talk event and people were happy.
When we changed from "Dareka no Tameni" to "Seishun Girls", everyone wanted to perform on the first day of "Seishun Girls" so they all worked very hard.
When the other kenkyuuseis were called to perform, Mizuki was the only one not called. And I remember this is when I started to dislike the lessons.
But I was very happy when the first day ended without any trouble.
Then NMB48 debuted on CD.
There was only songs from Team N and I was frustrated.
A-nyan graduated and I wasn't sure how to feel.
Then Yuppi was promoted and took A-nyan's position in performances.
I was really sad but the other kenkyuuseis cheered me up and I was happy.
I was also happy when I got a lot of messages and presents on my birthday.
Nana and Ayame also wrote me letters and that made me happy as well.
I got a huge ken-tama from fans and I was happy. I brought it with me when I went around Japan.
Then NMB48 released its second CD.
I remember everyone was happy that Natsumin got into Senbatsu.
But I also remember that prior to this announcement, I attended a handshake event and shook hands with fans after crying.
Kinoshita was chosen for the 3rd CD but I was not.
Around this time WING was formed, though it was unofficial.
It means everyone will spread their wings and fly towards their dreams, and it was exciting.
Then I told someone higher-up in Yoshimoto about WING. I said we would like to go on a radio show and they seemed happy about it.
But we ended up not doing anything on radio.
When the disciplined members returned, I ended up not performing much.
They were immediately placed in senbatsu upon returning and it made me really frustrated.
What does this mean for WING, who worked very hard during their absence?
Then Team M was announced and 5 of the WING members were chosen.
I was actually sad and not happy at all.
They say kenkyuuseis will be promoted if they work hard.
Everyone worked hard but in the end only 5 were promoted.
So now do people think A-pon, Arii and Mizuki don't work as hard?
I thought about this a lot.
But I beg to differ.
A-pon goes to lessons every day
Arii does her best to balance high school and lessons
Takahashi-san, whom I admire very much, said hard work always pays off
But I don't think so.
This is where "graduation" occurred to me.
Having entered NMB, I was able to experience a lot of extraordinary things that I wouldn't be able to do elsewhere.
I am grateful towards NMB.
I don't have a lot of time left in NMB, but I'd like to thank everyone for their support.
I would also like to say that I did well in my studies and I was able to get into high school.
Please keep leading NMB48
Natsumin, Riona, Ayame, Renapyon, Kinoshita
Please make Team M a better team and hope you get along well with 2nd generation members
Arii and A-pon
There's still a lot to learn for 3rd generation members
And Team BII, do your best!
Everyone will be there at my graduation performance
It would be great if everyone from WING can perform
Now it feels like I'm talking about my memories.
I am sorry this ended up being a long post.
I will do my best until I graduate.
Thank you for your support!